


Just Never Met a Girl I Like Half as Much as You

by mthrfkrgdhrwego (universalchampbalor)



Category: Professional Wrestling
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Dean is Bad With Feelings™, Feelings Realization, Inspired by Poetry, M/M, Mutual Pining, Songfic, i've had this planned for a long time and it has Not come out the way i thought it would, im v dumb and v tired
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-09-26 00:19:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17131442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/universalchampbalor/pseuds/mthrfkrgdhrwego
Summary: Dean likes girls. He's straight. So why does he feel so funny around his best friend?





	1. Chapter 1

Dean likes girls.

He knows this for a  _ fact _ . There was Christina Von Eerie, a punk girl with a mohawk who got Dean high for the first time in middle school. There was Reby Sky, a chick that he hooked up with in freshman year and lost his virginity to. There was Renee Young, a nice girl who’s way out of his league who was his first  _ real _ relationship.

He knows he likes girls, he knows he’s straight. It’s a fact. He doesn’t like dudes.

So why does he feel funny around his best friend?

It isn’t a friend thing; he never got like this around Callihan, or around Seth, or even around Sami Zayn, for Christ's sake. He feels, well,  _ normal _ , around them, even though they’re all objectively attractive people. Hell, he’s shared a  _ bed _ with Seth for two god damn weeks and didn't’ feel a damn thing even though the kid sleeps in the buff.

He knows a few things, about himself, about Roman, about his… his  _ feelings. _

He knows that Roman is  _ gorgeous,  _ far more gorgeous than anyone has a right to be. He’s seen attractive guys; he’s friends with Finn Bálor, who’s probably the prettiest guy on the planet, has known Tyler Breeze for years, considers Sami one of his best friends.

But Roman…. He’s something different. He’s more than  _ pretty _ . He’s hot, yeah, but it goes beyond that. He’s the kind of beautiful that makes people write poetry. He remembers reading “ _ One Hundred Love Sonnets _ ” in his junior year English class, remembers reading the words and thinking of Roman, thinking how the poem…  _ fit _ Roman, fit how he thought of Roman.

He knows that he isn’t someone who knows emotions well. He’s the first person to admit that he’s fucked up, too many years of abuse and drugs and more stuff he’d rather forget about to develop  _ normally _ . He can’t  _ deal _ with anything, doesn’t know how, never learned how. He could be looking love in the face and not recognize it.

He knows he and Roman are close. Roman’s the first friend he ever made, when he thinks about it. And yeah, growing up he had Callihan and TJ and all the others from the underground fights he did when he was younger and even dumber. They weren’t  _ real _ friends though. They were friends made of necessity because without those tentative alliances, none of them would’ve survived.

Roman’s the first friend he made that actually gave a damn about him. And Roman  _ cared _ , he really did, cared enough to let Dean live with him while his mom was in jail for the third time in his first semester. Hell, he practically lives with Roman now. Roman helps pick him up after fights and patch up all the random wounds he accumulates. 

He knows he has a lot of emotions regarding Roman.

He’s grateful to Roman. The kid practically saved his life in the long run, when it comes down to it. He likes Roman. He’s smart and funny and he cares and he’s soft and he smells nice and he’s pretty and. And he makes Dean feel nice.

He makes Dean feel  _ really  _ nice. Roman makes Dean feel like there’s he’s floating, makes him feel like he’s high without, y’know, being high. Whenever he hugs Dean, which is often, it fills Dean’s stomach with something more akin to angry moths than butterflies. He’s  _ big _ , broader than Dean, could easily snap him in half, but he lets Dean set the pace for anything they do, reins in his strength when they rough house and play-wrestle and play football. It makes Dean feel  _ warm _ .

Ok, now that he reflects on it, Dean might be in love with Roman.

He’s pretty sure he’s in love.

_ Fuck _ .

Logically, he knows that it could, theoretically, happen. He knows that gay people exist and that it’s perfectly fine. Hell, he’s caught Seth making moon eyes at Finn more times than he can count. He  _ knows _ it’s fine and logical and almost damn likely.

But he isn’t gay.   



	2. Chapter 2

“You’re a fucking idiot.”

Dean doesn’t know  _ why _ he went to Seth. Sure, he’s probably his closest friend other than Roman, but he’s a shithead and Dean hates him approximately 40% of the time. He’s also got his head permanently up his ass and has said maybe three smart things in the four years they’ve known each other.

But here they are anyways, holed up in the treehouse behind Roman’s house. They’re supposed to be studying, but that pretense was almost immediately abandoned for the sake of gossip on Seth’s part and blowing spitballs on Dean’s part.

“Fuck you too, asshole.” Dean gripes, slouching further into the wall supporting his weight. He blows another spitball and pegs Seth right between the eyes, cackling as his friend squeaks and scrapes the mass of paper and spit off his forehead.

“I’m serious though. You’re so fucking dumb.” Seth doesn’t elaborate, instead turning his attention to his half-painted nails. He’s got a bottle of black nail polish next to his schoolwork, spread on the rickety desk Seth’s sitting in front of.

“Care to explain? You telling me I’m a dumbass isn’t going to help the problem.” Dean grumbles, tossing his straw aside. He busies himself by drumming out a beat on the floor with a pair of sticks, a pale imitation of an old Stones song.

Seth throws a notebook at Dean’s head to get him to stop. He does, but he hurls his makeshift drumsticks at Seth instead. They miss, thankfully, and bounce off the wall behind Seth. The younger teen groans. 

“So you think you might be in love with Roman, right?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. He makes a wild gesture when Dean doesn’t respond. He finally gets a nod. “So talk about Roman. Describe him to me like I’ve never met him.”

Dean looks at him, but ends up groaning when Seth doesn’t back down. “Fine. He’s… he’s the nicest person I’ve ever met. He let me live with him and he’s always trying to make everyone happy. He’s so fucking considerate that he’d fucking bend over backward for anyone and apologize if someone spit in his face. He’s soft and sweet and he’s  _ gorgeous _ and his hugs feel like home and.” He snaps his teeth together, mouth slamming shut as his cheeks turn red.

“First of all,” Seth says, “why the fuck don’t you talk that nicely about me, and second of all, how the  _ fuck _ are you just realizing you’re in love with him?” He snarks, kicking his feet up on the desk.

Dean throws a shoe at Seth’s head. “Shut the fuck up, dickhead. What the fuck am I supposed to  _ do _ about this?” He groans, standing up harshly. He starts pacing, walking back and forth angrily.

Seth shrugs. “Tell him he’s hot and offer to suck his dick.” He offers. He dodges as Dean’s other shoe comes sailing at his head. “What?”

“I’m not gonna offer to su-” Dean shuts himself up as Mama Reigns’ voice comes up the ladder, yelling that dinner’s ready.

Seth pushes past Dean to get to the ladder. “That’s all I got, dude.” His voice somehow doesn't get quieter as he scrambles down the makeshift ladder.

Dean groans and throws up his hands. “You’re fucking useless for my problems. I don't even know why we're friends.” He shoves Seth when he gets to the bottom of the ladder. 

“Ask Finn for help. He's way better at this touchy-feely stuff than I am.” Seth shoves him back.

“Sure, pawn me and my problems off to your boyfriend, why don't you.” Dean shoots back with a wolf's grin.

He laughs as Seth turns red and sputters.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm miztle-toe on Tumblr! Come bug me!  
> Song inspiration and title credit to "Tim Wish You Were Born a Girl" by Of Montreal.  
> Poetry inspiration and credit to "One Hundred Sonnets" by Pablo Neruda, "Something About You" by Hillary Louise, and "Home Wrecker" by Ocean Vuong


End file.
